Letting go

Dearest B,

You started school this year and I am so proud of you. You have learnt so much in just two terms, I am totally blown away. You can read, write numbers, and add up. You know all about nocturnal animals too. Your concentration and focus is deep. I can see as you read you are so proud of yourself. Congratulations.

I do feel overwhelmed for you as you have so much more to learn. You go off to school so happy and so brave. You are a marvel.

It seems you are testing the boundaries at school. How much can you get away with, what will they tell my parents. Unfortunately lies will catch up with you. It saddens me that you lied to me. That is more upsetting than you scratching your friend. I understand that we all get frustrated and act out that frustration in our anger. I am more angry about the lie.

A simple lie is very hurtful. Its like the beginning of a new phase in our relationship. Now you are fully aware of our separateness and that I will only know what you tell me. I must change with you as you grow. I love you so much. You are changing so fast, growing up, learning and developing.

It is so hard to let go of you into that tough world of the playgrounds. . I want to protect you. Cover your ears from the pain of innocent words. All I can do is prepare you. But are you listening to me? I must remember that you will learn from my actions as well as my words. I must listen with time to you, carefully, and in-between your words.

I will remind you often of all the positive things you are achieving.

Love from Mummy

X

PS Daddy and I watched an ABC1 TV program about kids in school called "Solving the jigsaw". Its a special course for kids on communication and assertiveness to help them deal with bullying and other issues. An amazing facilitator Bernadette really listened to kids and enabled them to acknowledge some very big emotions and issues. These 10 year olds were dealing with bullying, domestic violence, and family separation. They were learning to voice their emotions and confront the adults in their lives with assertion. It was very moving and inspiring. We both wished we had experienced this course at school and thought it should be part of every schools curriculum.